Of course he couldn't go outside because he was not yet cleared for it. The Haven has a system of levels and based on this level patients are accorded certain privileges. For the first few days - I don’t remember exactly how many - Scott is watched 24 hours a day. We can imagine that this corresponds to level 0. Gradually, as they get “promoted” to the next level, they are allowed to do things such as go outside in a group with supervision, and I think by the time they get to level 5, they can go outside with family members and no medical staff required.
Every day there is tremendous angst, for Chuck, my sisters and for me, around what level Scott would be at and when he might get cleared to the next level. The hardest times are the weekends. On weekends the patients need to just sit tight. We often say that they are just "parked" on weekends. Their regular doctor is not there and no level changes take place.
Much of the specific details of those days escapes me now. I believe there are the memories that we can’t delete no matter how hard we try and there are those that the mind mercifully dulls slowly with the passage of time. As I recall it was a beautiful August. The sun was warm and the breeze gentle. In the mornings, we would sit outside on the back patio, under a blue sky, drinking coffee and waiting for it to be time for visiting hours. I couldn’t drink caffeine because of my anxiety, but I guess I drank decaf or had tea.
We have since learned that type 1 leans towards the manic side, always involves hospitalization, and usually comes with a psychotic break. But at the time, when we were so new to bipolar, we scoured the pamphlets from the hospital and the internet, trying to figure out which type he had, and in the absence of confirmation, which type we wished he had. At times we researched what questions to ask, and at times, I at least, practiced escapism, retreating to my garden to pull weeds, or sweep the front steps. Anything to support the illusion that I had some control over some aspects of my life. But all these activities were just preludes to the main event of the day, which was the drive down to the hospital for the start of visiting hours.